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“Lofty thoughts” by Pamela Schloesser Canepa
When I was a child, I seemed to have a pleasant ability to lift myself out of my current reality and imagine things that would take me away from boredom or desperation. It may not totally fit the definition of ‘lofty,’ but this is what I think of when I hear that word. Some of the later experiences were not all positive as a teen, but I’ll focus on the ones that “lifted me up.” I only remember a few incidents, and I don’t know why. Are they all that I can remember? Perhaps they were all related to dreams, and having such a vivid imagination, I of course would see wild things when my subconcsious took control? I read somewhere that the conscious actually does control the subconscious. Still, some dreams mean nothing other than giving a vivid picture to some feeling, fear, or hurt that already goes on inside. That’s what I believe, anyway.
- We were on a cross country trip when I was four, maybe five. It was early morning, and I looked up in the sky to see that the sun was coming out, and the moon was trying desperately to fit itself, squeeze itself, back into the curtain of darkness that was already fading away on one side of the sky. It had to try quickly before the sun chased all the darkness away. I have a feeling I probably dosed off again, because this situation never resolved itself before my eyes.
- I was about eight and attending a summer camp where we tried to get closer to God. I was falling asleep at bedtime, and some noise woke me up; it was like I felt myself fall down back down into my body from where I had been floating. Holy smokes! Did I have the ability to levitate at age eight? No, it was more likely a vivid imagination, a dream so real I had the sensation of floating up until I awoke out of it. And no, it wasn’t a near death experience, either.
The image of the sun and moon seemed so real to me, I did not believe it was a dream. Some dreams seem so real because they are trying to tell you something, for me, that I was compelled to try to bring things to life with my words. I want to make it as real for you as it seems for me. I’m still trying, depositing a stone of reality within every flood of fiction.
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