Strangers are Watching, #RDP, #RRBC

By Pamela Schloesser Canepa, (c) 2022

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

The creatures hooked up their all-terrain space vehicle after landing on an airstrip. “Welcoming of them, isn’t it?” Eggbert chuckled. After a short drive They arrived outside of a Lou’s Best Pies diner.

Gawking at them by the door of the restaurant was a propped up skeleton. 👀 “Humans don’t look like that ” Venice commented.

“Well, but they do on the inside, ” Eggbert answered.

“Could they have become a cannibalistic society now? Is that a trophy?” Venice asked.

The sign said, “Prize-winning chicken dinner on special today”. Eggbert suspected Venice was wrong, but didn’t have the true answer. So instead of looking uninformed, he said nothing to debunk Venice’s theory.

“Activating invisibility shield,” he mumbled as a huge truck barreled into the parking lot. It had two skulls and a chain on the front grill. It seems humans now hunted humans for sport.

“Ready for human camouflage?” he asked as Venice gawked at the truck and it’s decorations.

“I guess,” Venice answered.

Soon they were in the restaurant, listening to two young and cocky teens banter back and forth. “Just wait till Halloween, Chad. I will scare the crap out of you.”

“Oh yeah? Well I’ll get you, man. You will just die!”

You will just die? What kind of sport is this?

The two aliens made sure to sit near the young teens. Eggbert had always been told to fit in at any cost, to do ” as the Romans do.” He was perfectly willing, but he wasn’t quite sure about Venice’s sensibilities.

“Are you okay with this, Venice?” he asked.

“Totally,” Venice answered, batting her eyelashes at one of the teens. She quickly shook her head as if to shake It off. “I think their hormones are polluting the air around me. You got to watch out for me Egbert. I mean, I can look out for myself, but if you think I’m starting to act foolish, tell me.”

Eggbert sighed. This had never happened on the job with Venice before, though she had formerly been a birthing creature. Perhaps her insides were trying to motivate her to procreate with a human. Ick, he thought. “Okay. I will.”

“I’ll snap out of it. I will. So, did we disguise our vehicle to look like theirs?”

“Yep. Good thing too. That gray minivan out there is plenty of ugly. Though I did see a miniature skeleton hanging inside of it. The trophies are quite prevalent around here.”

“Well, I think that gives us permission to collect a few of our own,” Venice said with a wink.

“Let’s stick with these guys and see what they’re about,” Egbert suggested. “If you can handle it.”

“Are you kidding? I’m ready to outfit our vehicle with chains and big wheels! Maybe this is how they deal with over-population.”

“Could be.” Eggbert smiled and two tens materialized in his hand as the two young men paid at the cas register. He moved up and got in line between the two , realizing that Venice had chosen to be disguised as a male. Albeit, a male with beautiful eyelashes. Ugh! Distraction was contagious around here!

Venice waited for him at their vehicle, holding two huge pieces of metal with her huge human arms. “These will mold into chains nicely.”

“Ah, yes. Maybe wait until we can get to an abandoned area.”

“That was my plan. I tell you, we’ll show those irritable humans how to play. And there will be trophies!”

Eggbert clapped a hand on Venice’s back as the young men passed them. ” That’s right brother. You’ll be an excellent hunter in no time.”

“Let’s hurry and get our set up before they get out of our range of scent,” Venice whispered.

Thirty minutes later they emerged from a path in the woods with a truck larger than an F-350 with chains on the front grill.

“The secret is aggression, ” Egbert said.

“Of course. We keep ramming them til they roll their vehicle and run out. Then we’ve got ’em!” Venice squealed, excitedly.

“Venice, these humans are really rubbing off on you,”Egbert stated. He smacked Venice’s shoulder in solidarity, revving his engine.

*Posted in response to the Ragtag Community prompt at https://wp.me/p9YcOU-3GW

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“Sham.” Out of the Mouths of Babes…

“Here, honey.  Hand me the pillow sham.  Your hands are clean, right?”

“The what?”  Little Geoffrey asked.

“This is a pillow sham.  It covers the pillow.”  Shawna took it from him and inserted the pillow.

“Daddy said your diet is a sham.  I don’t get it?”  Geoffrey scratched his head.

Shawna grimaced, trying not to react.  “Okay, perhaps it is.”

“So what is a sham?”

She fluffed and smacked the pillows.  “It covers the truth.  Like this covers an ugly pillow.”

“Your diet covers the truth?”

She turned to him.  “I guess so.”  She laughed.  “It’s a sham.  Just like your dad’s and my marriage.”

This is my entry response for the Ragtag Daily Prompt, word of the day: sham.  Intrigued?  Visit https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/08/08/rdp-thursday-sham/

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Books You May Not Know of….

…But you ought to try!

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Okay, I’ll be honest, I read Dogrun by Arthur Nersesian 17 years ago.  I was going through a break up and a re-evaluation of my life.  The main character goes through a sort if breakup, well, to be honest, her boyfriend dies.  She has to re-evaluate her life.  In addition, she has to look for a job and navigate the world of dating, during which she gets set up with a guy who has a foot fetish.

At any rate, the way she becomes single again is sort of dark and odd, but it had been a bad relationship.  She has a dog (which is awesome), and she lives in New York, hence, the need for a dog run.  If you enjoy laughing at things you shouldn’t laugh at and identify with characters whose lives seem like one screw up after another, you’ll like Dogrun.  It’s sort of a Bridget Jones mixed with Bernadette Peters’ in the movie “Slaves of New York.” It was published by MTV books, but I looked it up recently and it seems to have gotten another publisher.  Now, go find your copy and get ready to laugh from a dark, twisted side of you!

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You can find this book at https://www.amazon.com/Dogrun-Arthur-Nersesian-ebook/dp/B003N3TUAM in Kindle or paperback.  It is not appropriate for kids under sixteen.

The subject of this book came up in a conversation with my boyfriend.  To make a long story short, I have loaned him the book because I thought it fit right in with his sense of humor.  Then, I got the idea for this post.  I picked this book up because of the blurb and the MTV books on the back (which is probably now defunct) and did not regret it.  After getting a Kindle in 2012, I started reading many of those books Amazon recommends, and I’ve been rewarded for that choice about 80% of the time.  There is beauty in choosing to read a book that everyone else may not have heard of yet.  This is why I started this post series.  I look forward to sharing more books with you!

 

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