Weekend Coffee Share. “Life Goes On.”


Welcome to my Weekend Coffee Share, hosted by Allison at Eclectic Ali.  It has been another busy week, but I ended it with a day off for an appointment.  I was getting nervous about this appointment anyway, because if something didn’t look right to them, something could possibly be wrong, so I decided I would not go back to work after it and requested a whole day of leave.  Though it turned out okay, I am still glad I did.  Well, I lived through the uncomfortable appointment, a re-check mammogram and ultrasound, and after long waiting periods, was told that everything is fine and I just have a little cyst.  “No problem, you’re just getting older and things change.”  Whatever.  Thanks for the reassurance.  At least I don’t have to go for any further testing, but I tell you, this also happened last year.  I don’t like it, but I’ll rejoice that it wasn’t something more serious.

Yes, I was slightly worried as there is a lot of other stress in my life.  Not only is there a unique amount of risk to being a woman, but there is a unique amount of risk to being  a teacher these days.  Just watch the news.  Yada, yada, yada.  All of this in addition to state testing.  These last two things also burden our students, and when emotionally burdened, some of them act out.  I’ve been handling it.  I’ve also been looking inward and wondering if I am coming to a crossroads.  Is something wrong with me?  How will I face it?  Shoot, I have asked that question regarding school shootings as well.  One good end product of this week, however, is that I have been talking to God more.  I go out and walk the dog and see the beautiful night sky, and I know the world and the heavens are still there, no matter what happens to me.  I have told him I will face it like a champ and do my best.  There are so many others less fortunate, who have fought or lost battles with their health or fought to save the lives of children.  I would never go down without a fight in either scenario.

The sum of my week’s anxiety was that I am healthy, maybe getting old and changing, but healthy.  So, the rest of the day consisted of relaxing and then discovering my hair stylist could fit me in for a cut and style.  I need this hair to be easier to do in the morning.  I’m really going for asymmetric.  Hey, my chiropractor has told me one leg is longer than the other.  We all are pretty asymmetrical, so let’s celebrate it!  🙂

In between and in the waiting room, I had done a lot of reading and just started The Gum Thief.  I must say, I’m really enjoying it.  Although, in its paperback form (which I had ordered) the print is small enough to require me to wear readers and remind me I am not thirty anymore.  Blah, blah, blah.  No complaining here!

At the end of the day, Mom and I had dinner together at a little neighborhood restaurant/bar.  There was karaoke outside so we went out and had a drink.  It was fun to people watch, but I decided I wanted to sing.  It’s been a while, and why not celebrate my nutty, fearless self!  I sang Bobby McGee by Joplin and Back on the Chain Gang by the Pretenders.  Mom had great fun just watching me and talking to other people around.  I am so glad I took her outside for the fun.

My current read is pictured above, and I am loving it!  Two people who work together and have weird observations on life share their perspectives when one of them finds the other’s journal.  He is a budding writer, lonely and middle-aged.  She is a young Goth complete with black lipstick.  It’s really entertaining!

Oh, I am seriously looking forward to summer and all the writing and reading I can do (though I’ve started the reading already)!  Before this, I just finished Kindred by Octavia Butler and loved it!  See my review at Goodreads:  https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2075655367


Kindred by Octavia E. Butler

I have also been thinking on ideas for my WIP, Malachi, and at the same time, the character of Ellie, who pops up in Malachi’s life, is getting stronger.  Here is a visualization I found this week of Ellie at one point of her life: https://pamelascanepa.wordpress.com/2019/05/09/character-visualization-and-wip-detours-in-time-series-amwriting-scifi/

That’s my week in a nutshell! I am healthy, Schrodinger’s cat has been released, better safe than sorry, and all those other lovely platitudes.

You all have a great week!


Avoiding Bottleneck. #WeekendCoffeeShare


white mug near book

Photo by Bruno Cervera on Pexels.com

Welcome to the Weekend Coffe Share, hosted by Allison at Eclectic Alli.

This morning, I woke up with a song in my head by Alt-J, and that is a good thing!  It’s called Dissolve Me, one of their more relaxing, upbeat tunes.  I am now playing music by Lana Rey, one of my current musical obsessions, and my coffee is not done yet.  Hope you don’t mind.  I’ve gone light on the coffee this last week.  Perhaps I need that to stay calmer and mellow right now.  I certainly need a calmer stomach.

You see, this past week was a storm of esophagal proportions.  No, you wouldn’t normally put those words together, but… that’s how it felt.  So I took Monday off. Then, I went in to work Tuesday morning and….went home after noon, head spinning, stomach still hurting.  Yes, I brought work with me so it wouldn’t all get stacked up with more work at school.  After some grading, I slept much of Tuesday afternoon and night.  I missed yoga this week and did not see the chiropractor, two must-haves in my current search for calm and well-being.  I think we all need to seek calm and well-being.  Just look at the national news.  Gladly, I missed out on every little detail, but people are posting daily in reaction to this news of the Kavanough fiasco.  Some, several times a day.  It’s almost too much to fit into my head, but I want everyone to understand something.  Women used to get shocked by the reality of their gender and what they had to accept.  Then, they would just give up.  Now, all of that is changing.

Now, I suppose my politics will shine through here despite my being very general and vague on what my political stance is.  However, people are vilifying the woman for “coming forward now.”  Perhaps it’s because his face is plastered all over t.v. as the latest nominee for Supreme Court?  Makes it hard to forget past events.  Makes it hard to forget someone who wrecked your young life, if he is guilty, of course.  I am sick of this world making villains out of accusers, before all the facts are out.  I am sick of seeing young, white men let off the hook because of being ‘young and stupid’ or having ‘affluenza.’ Yeah, they can stick that word somewhere south and let it never see the light of day again.  These things are up front in the news much more lately.  Why?  Because women won’t just take it like we used to.  Maybe the tides are turning.  Maybe women will have enough support to stand up and speak for what has happened, because I sure feel it never used to be that way.

So, while people were posting all over social media their opinions of this latest news fiasco, I have been posting daily a photo of a once banned book that I have either read and loved or actually taught in school.  I am proudly in support of intellectual freedom, of people having the right to tell their stories for the purpose of either sharing truths or revealing universal truths wrapped in fictional whimsy.  As a young one, I learned of horrible realities in the pages of Stephen King’s fiction, but I also was presented with incredible heroes who fought evil and stood up to their fear.  I think my mother wanted that for me, and therefore, did not limit my reading material, and I am all the better for it.

Okay, my plan was to relax a little today, but I think I’d better let my coffee cool since I got a little warmed up with this post, unintentionally.   My friends, please do not obsess over the latest news, there is so much more to life.  There is so much more to you, and me.  Your side may win or lose.  There are only so many things you can change, and posting every 30 minutes on Facebook is not going to change it but will only add to the hyper-stress of this modern world.  I will speak my peace, but I will leave it there and concentrate on other things as well…my dog, my family, my spirituality, physical well-being, the busy work of my job and the inspiring moments of teaching, along with great books, and writing!  Writing, something I don’t do enought lately, but there’s this post. 🙂  I apologize if this was such an outburst.  Sigh.  But I feel better having shared with you.

By the way, I haven’t been writing much as I am so busy, but a week ago, a wrote a flash-fiction in response to a photo that is a nice little get-away.  Care to take a glimpse?  Flash Fiction FFfAW

Have a great week, everyone!


Anxiety, The Phantom (Poetry)

By Pamela Schloesser Canepa
Anxiety, The Phantom copyright, 1.05.16
A windy night brings it. Bam!
The back porch door slams
And I’m left to wonder what is there
What glowing eyes in the night will glare?
I am like a child, four years old again,
My fear and imagination bends.
What hoodlum or phantom lurks here?
I sense something evil crouching near.
Gone is all hope of sleep.
I must be ready in case he leaps.

“He” is my fear of things unseen,
Politicians and terrorists threatening me,
Bills, undone tasks, that won’t let me free,
Narrow minded people judging me
Worry for my son, in his melancholy
TV news feeding branches of my anxiety.
Things that make me think I have no weapon,
Realities that happen, with or without mention.
My canine detects no offending thief,
And only morning daybreak brings relief.

Untitled design

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